I respect my boundaries, and I insist that others respect them too. - Louise Hay

Energy Vampires. They are real and they are toxic.

I know because I’ve had to deal with some pretty nasty ones over the years.

In my healing practice, I regularly hear that clients have been dealing with people who are energy vampires but so often they have not heard the term and have no idea how to spot one or how to protect themselves.

So, in this post, I will use my personal experience with these energy suckers to help you identify them and learn how to protect yourself against their advances.

Who are Energy Vampires?

An energy vampire is a person who literally sucks the energy out of you.

The majority of energy vampires do this subconsciously and are unaware of their behaviour, but there are some who know they are doing it and continue regardless because it makes them feel powerful and in control. Just remember that these people are usually very damaged and nothing that you do or say will likely result in them changing their ways.

And remember, we all have times when we seek the energy of other people to lift us up. However, the difference between a healthy person and an energy vampire is that the healthy person takes what they need to recover and then returns to getting energy from healthy sources such as food, water, exercise, healthy relationships and the universe; whereas an energy vampire can take energy from others for their entire life.

How do I spot an Energy Vampire?

We all have family members, friends and even romantic partners who drain us. In a healthy relationship, this draining feeling is balanced out with feeling uplifted as we swap roles and support each other. But if you are always the one doing the uplifting and are never receiving, then you are in the presence of an energy vampire…

Like the friend who always moans about their life but feels better after they have spoken to you.

Or the partner who constantly puts you down or teases you to make themselves feel better.

Or the sibling who is always manipulating a situation to get their own way at your expense.

Like the co-worker who gets you to do all the work and then takes the credit.

The one thing these people all share in common is that they usually seem miserable with their own lot and blame everyone else for everything that happens in their life.

We’ve all met them and we often give them the benefit of the doubt. But once you have realised that they may be sucking your energy from you it is always a good idea to do something about it when you see the red flags.

How do they do it?

As well as existing in the physical plane, we also exist on an energetic level (known as the 4th dimension). At this level, we interact and communicate with everything around us energetically. This is the level at which our aura and chakras function. It is also the level at which I work with crystals and Reiki with my clients.

Much like wi-fi works without us seeing it (but we know when it’s on the blink!), this personal energy is constantly interacting with the world around us and people we know and care about. The hardest idea for most people to grasp is that it doesn’t actually matter how far away the actual person is from us, their intention to take energy from us (or indeed send energy to us) is just as powerful whether they are next to us or across the planet.

Have you ever had the feeling that someone is thinking badly of you and then you find out that they were talking about you behind your back? This is an example of this exchange of energy.

Energy vampires send cords of energy out to the people the take energy from and literally use that cord as a vacuum cleaner to suck whatever energy they need.

How to protect yourself

While you can’t change the way that these people act, you can protect yourself from them and learn to keep your energy for yourself so you no longer feel drained or resentful.

Here are my 4 Cs of protecting my own energy:

  • Contact – learn to limit the amount of time you spend with people who drain you. It is not your responsibility to lift them up all the time – they need to learn to do that for themselves. Have a plan to leave their company BEFORE they drain you completely. Doing this a number of times can actually help some energy vampires to create their own healthy energy source and become less draining on you over time.
  • Carry crystals – this is my favourite protective method as it is easy to carry tumblestones around with you and you can hold them when you feel anxious about the person in question. Black Tourmaline and Black Obsidian are my favourites for this but any crystal that you feel connected to you and would like to carry will help.
  • Cut Cords – I recommend seeing a healer in the first instance as they will be able to advise you on ways of cutting your own cords in future. They can also help remove other psychic debris from your energy field that will help you tune in to your own energy more easily in future and prevent cords from reforming.
  • Circle of Love – surround yourself with positive people who love you for who you are and who support you just as much as you support them. Building a tribe of people for your circle is probably the best way of combating energy vampires that I know of.

“I respect my boundaries, and I expect everyone else to respect them too.” Louise Hay 

That’s my introduction to energy vampires and how you can protect yourself against them.

Remember that facing their onslaught with love and an understanding that they are damaged is the healthiest way forward for you.

Here’s to your good energy!

Heal. Grow. Learn. Thrive. with Holly Hinton

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