This past week my emotions have been all over the place – riding high with birthday love and rugby fun, then sinking low when things aren’t moving quite as quickly as I want them to. But knowing that changing emotions are part of life’s rollercoaster and honouring those emotions as they arise can help us learn more about ourselves and ultimately deal with those emotions in a healthy way.
How does it affect you?
Growing up you may have been told not to be angry or not to cry and that showing ‘negative’ emotions is a sign of weakness. But by squashing down and hiding the stuff that makes us feel bad, we internalise it and allow those emotions to take a greater grip on us than if we allow them out. A vicious cycle then emerges and we don’t know how to deal with future conflicts or loss and hide more and more of our feelings under the surface. This can lead to feelings of inadequacy, resentment, bitterness, low self-esteem and even depression.
In energy terms emotions are stored in our field just like carbohydrates and fats are stored in our physical body. Feelings such as joy, peace and love support and nourish our soul whilst feelings of anger, bitterness, envy and even worry can slow us down and make us feel physically sick. The key is not to ignore the ‘bad’ feelings, but to deal with them as they arise. By doing so we actually help our field cleanse itself of stuck, heavy emotions and replace them with lightness and flow.
What we really need to understand is that ALL of our emotions and feelings are valid and we need to surround ourselves with friends and family who understand and support this too. Being happy, balanced, peaceful, calm and grateful are all wonderful states of being, but shit really does happen and learning to deal with it is so important. And teaching our children to deal with it is even more important.
What can you do about it?
When those not-so-nice emotions arise, be kind to yourself. Honour your feelings, give yourself permission to feel that way and take a few moments to really try and understand why it hurts so much. They are valid and you are no less of a person just because today you are not coping with them like in your normal superhero mode. Try asking for help, eating well, nurturing yourself, speaking to a friend, telling someone how you feel, being honest about your feelings – with others and with yourself, turning the stereo up, dancing, running, getting out in nature, seeing a therapist, having a ‘well’ day off work, watching soppy movies, drawing or painting, taking a bath, buying yourself flowers or writing a journal.
I have spent days cocooned on the sofa looking at old photos and diaries after a good friend passed away, scream ‘F**k It’ at the top of my voice when things aren’t great and reach out to friends both here and back in Oz for support. This work is not just important, it’s vital as only by letting the storm wash over you and then seeing the rainbow at the other end can we truly get stronger and learn to deal with future hurt.
Life really is a rollercoaster and the downs are just as important as the ups, and just remember…
If you need any support with ways of dealing with the rollercoaster of life, then drop me a note – it’s what I do x